The Love DuCote Law Firm LLC Legal Blog

Mediation may not be right for your divorce

Not all marriages last. With the divorce rate still remaining around 50%, couples in Texas are fully aware of the possibility of divorce even before they say I do. Still, when you are your spouse have decided to call it quits, this can feel like a shock. From the moment that you or your spouse asked for a divorce, you have felt a constant wave of thoughts and emotions. You want the process to be as quickly as possible, but you are faced with so many uncertainties and disagreements, this does not seem possible.

Alternative dispute resolutions, such as mediation, appeals to you, as it is considered a cost effective and efficient way to complete a divorce. But you are feeling apprehensive, as you and your ex are unable to see eye-to-eye on many divorce issues.

Mediation is not for everyone, and that is a difficult idea to digest for some. However, there are many red flags that indicate that this process is not the best way to divorce, which means that going through the courts is the best route for them.

A sure sign that mediation is not right is having so much animosity with your soon-to-be ex-spouse that the two of you are unable to communicate with one another. The backbone of the mediation process is the ability to talk things out, cooperate and reach a resolution together. If the couple cannot begin to work together to reach solutions to their problems, then mediation will not work.

Next, when there is a history of drug or alcohol abuse or domestic violence existed in the marriage, mediation is likely to be very difficult. Trust is needed to move forward with a resolution designed by the mediation process, and if that doesn’t exist or one spouse is unwilling to speak to the other, then mediation will not be successful. Similarly, if mental health issues are involved, mediation will likely be challenging.

Child custody issues, such as not being able to see eye-to-eye on a parenting plan, frequently cause mediation to fail. While mediation may work for other divorce issues, if you and your spouse want very different custody arrangements, this will likely require a court to designate a custody plan.

Finally, when you or your spouse is simply unwilling to put forth the effort required by mediation, the process will likely fail. Mediation is not a quick and effortless process. It requires time, effort and the willingness to give and take. If you or your spouse is unwilling to budge on your stance or see the perspective of the other, mediation may not work.

There is no correct way to divorce; however, there is a divorce method that will work best for you. In order to understand what that is and what the divorce process will look like for you, it is important to explore your rights and options.


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